Small Group

Tapestry Small Group | Start A Movement.
Armando Heredia

A working model.
The basic premise for Tapestry small group is to create an avenue for men and women to connect in a spiritually positive environment for the sake of dialogue, fellowship and learning.

To many young people the traditional church model has failed. In many instances the church has successfully created an exit strategy for youth as opposed to creating a viable ministry that helps keep them connected to Christ. In fact, 65% of Christian young people leave their faith during their college age years. Our hope is to be able to create a social/spiritual group that focuses on the elements that drive this demographic (for a lack of a better term). Those being, in no certain order:

1. Relationships
2. Dialogue {Ideas and Counter-Ideas}
3. Spirituality

We’ll explore these elements briefly.

1. Relationships
   This age bracket has experienced a fundamental change in their relationship with the world around them by coming into the “Adult” age. They have left the smaller group of their high school and some (though not all) have entered into the larger world of college/university campuses. Others are on a career path that engages them everyday in a smaller more focused group. We can not overlook those who are actively engaged in neither a career nor college, those who stay at home, get married, or spend their time as a volunteer in community organizations or ministry.The relationship element is important for these people to be able to develop trust and friendship with others in their same age group as well as with an older mentor group that can help them grow spiritually. The lack of meaningful relationships that span outside of their own peer group can create a vacuum in their life when they are “pushed out the nest” and they are no longer connected to the other people who also “aged out” of the youth ministry and are left to fend for themselves.
2. Dialogue {Ideas and Counter-Ideas}
   The worst method for disseminating information is lecture. Unfortunately most churches exclusively employ the lecture method and the pastor/teacher delivers a monologue that doesn’t involve the congregants beyond listening and/or affirming with responses like “Amen” or a hand clap. If, however, there was a dissenting opinion or a hand raised in question to what was being taught the offender would be considered out of line at best. In actuality, the best method for teaching is dialogue, the exchange of ideas and information, the ability to ask questions, disagree with the speaker/teacher (with a valid counter).I was raised in a Spanish speaking home by my grandparents. They spoke Spanish to each other, they played Spanish music, watched Spanish television and even spoke Spanish to me. I grew up not being able to speak Spanish. The reason was because although Spanish was all around me, my grandparents never required me to respond in Spanish. I never articulated the ideas that were in my head into Spanish words. All of the ingredients were there, but my lack of participation in their monologue left me without the ability to respond in their language. I bring this up because I believe this is indicative of our young men and women’s lack of participation in Christianity as they become adults. They hear the monologue but are never required or allowed to articulate their thoughts and questions about the Christian ideologies they are being presented.

   Each small group session is geared toward the concept of dialogue. A rule that we established early on is, “It’s not rude to interrupt.” If one of our participants has a question or comment specific to the topic they are encouraged to engage at that moment. It is not unusual for a teacher to allow questions or comments at the end of the session so that they can get through all of their material or presentation. Truthfully, though, the session is not about presenting information as much as it is about developing people and relationships. Many times when we wait until the end of the session to ask the question it doesn’t seem as valid, so we don’t ask it or a comment will seem out of place at the end so it’s not made. The moment is missed and the opportunity for someone to articulate a comment or clarify an idea is missed and cannot be regained.

   Another rule that we follow is “You have the right to disagree.” We’re not just looking for affirmation for the speaker in these sessions. We are looking for clarity of understanding. In the post-modern information age the days of “If the pastor or leader says it, it must be true” are long gone. People are smart and they have incredible access to an array of information and ideas through technology like the internet, mobile apps. on their iphones, ipods and a host of other hand-held technology. They could be surfing the web on Wikipedia or a number of other information sites while you’re talking and have access to supporting or contradictory information to your presentation. So, we practice this rule of disagreement with this qualification: If you disagree it must be because you have a viable alternative to what is being said or taught. Then dialogue about the alternative idea ensues. This is not a time for argument and their may not be a resolution to the conflicting ideas. That’s when we agree to disagree and respect each other’s knowledge and move on. This can make for some incredibly engaging conversation and I have found that I learn more, as the presenter of the topic or facilitator of the discussion, than if I would have been giving a monologue from my perspective only. The participants in the session also have commented that they learn more in these sessions than they do in other forms of teaching. Articulation, the engagement of more than one sense and the process required forming counter arguments or supportive commentary, is the key to developing a group of young men and women who know what they believe and have an understanding of how to teach others.

3. Spirituality
   We live in a very spiritual culture. The culture, however, does not exclusively equate spirituality with Christianity. In fact, if you were to ask most people if they thought they were spiritual they would say yes even though they would also say they weren’t Christians.Our goal is to help our young men and women understand the difference between Christian religiosity and Christian spirituality. There is a difference. You can attend church services and not be spiritual if you don’t engage in spiritual activity on a regular basis. What this translates to is that if Christianity is just about going to church, than it’s not about much. Gathering with other believers to worship and hear preaching and teaching is important, but it is not the primary function of Christians. The primary function of Christians is to engage in a daily meaningful spiritual relationship with Jesus Christ so that we, as believers, can engage in meaningful physical relationships with the world around us that express our Christian spirituality and lead others to Him so they can engage in a daily meaningful spiritual relationship with Jesus Christ and repeat the model to infinity.

   The way Tapestry small group is a catalyst for this is by creating avenues that spirituality can be explored, encountered and expressed. Find outlets for this type of spirituality in community helps groups, prayer and ministry opportunities that your group can engage in.

Book Club

We have found that the best way to engage a group of people within the 18 to 26 age bracket is by reading a book together. Our group is essentially a book club with an incredible amount of discussion. The group’s directors find a book that has solid content and will encourage dialogue and then read a chapter per week, sometimes less if the chapters are long or there is a lot of discussion. We started with Donald Miller’s “Blue Like Jazz” and while we don’t subscribe to all of his theological ideas, there was enough substance in each chapter to spark some very interesting discussion. It was a great time of learning and we saw growth in the participants of the sessions.